…in other words, Saw 7 meets all expectations. The unlucky detail is that I expected it to suck.
The uncharismatic Jigsaw escaped the trap that the charismatic Jigsaw left his wife. And starts a new game, this time with the victim Bobby. Bobby self makes no sense at all as a character. He is a self help guru and book author who claims he’s a Jigsaw trap survivor, though he has really never been anywhere near a trap. Now, how does that work? Jigsaw is the most wanted killer, the crime scenes are the mekka of every cop in sight, and someone can just claim he survived a trap that didn’t exist?! And really no-one, especially not the cops, notice that? Nope, sorry. Doesn’t work for me at all.
Anyway, the original Jigsaw knew Bobby was lying – obviously. But how the… umm, 45th Jigsaw knew remains a mystery, and it also doesn’t matter. Bobby has to go through a game similar to Saw 3 and Saw 6, with his wife being the reward for ‘learning his lesson’. Oh, I miss the times when that lesson self was the reward… While Bobby plays, Jigsaw’s ex-wife goes into protective custody and sends a generic cop after the current Jigsaw, who once, when he was still a cop himself, saved the life of the cop hunting him now. Woohoo, who cares? No-one, including the movie.
Jigsaw is also more random than ever. The movie starts with a public triple saw blade trap of two lovers of the same greedy girl, hanging from the ceiling, getting cut in halfs. It has nothing to do with the story, but the two guys survive, so they are potential new Jigsaws for the inevitable sequels.
Early in the story, Jigsaw also kills four neo nazis on a junkyard, just because. None of them survives, so Saw 8 will still show political correct kills. Late in the movie, Jigsaw also slays an entire police station and kills all cops hunting him to then kill Jill, the ex-Jigsaw’s ex-wife. Just like the traps Bobby goes through, these kills are unoriginal and don’t have any message at all.
Bobby has to face various helpers on his way to survivor fame, like his manager, but he fails to save any of them and they die in half assed traps. When Bobby reaches the last room, where his wife is, he has to face the trap he claimed he survived in his book, yet again fails and his wife dies in basically the same trap as Obe in Saw 2. Just more pyros, but same story. Bobby then throws himself into an electric fence around the oven and dies. I think.
Jigsaw, who meanwhile killed all cops and Jill, sets his workshop on fire and leaves, just to be attacked by three people with pig masks – we haven’t seen those in a while – and finds himself in the basement from Saw 1. Guess who also got a message from the original Jigsaw, who was also a helper, and is now probably the new Jigsaw? Never mind, I tell you. It’s the guy who survived the basement. After sewing his foot off and creeping through the basement, he was healed by Jigsaw and became his helper. He is the doctor who recommended to kidnap the other doctor in Saw 3 and… really, who cares? I don’t, because it seems that really everyone who ever walked through the set was really a secret helper, ally or successor of the original Jigsaw and the next sequel will be just like the last one. Random victim, someone turns out as a helper and it’s neither surprising nor original, traps so unoriginal and meaningless that you wouldn’t learn a lesson from them if you studied them all your life, and another generic cop fails to catch whoever is Jigsaw that day.
Famous last words: It’s always sad to see a legend not die, but make a fool of itself. And that’s what the Saw series is doing proudly since at least Saw 4.